Feeling like something isn't quite right, but don't have specific examples to blame it on, just overall annoyed.
Zane even noticed this, probably because I have been treating him with resentment, ya know, because when I feel off, it must be his fault, right?!
Wrong.
I don't know how many times I have heard that my husband can't fulfill me, only my savior can. BUT, it wasn't until I heard it at just the right moment [ last night ] that it truly had time to sink in. It was in the midst of my discomfort, that I realized my discomfort lied within me, and not my husband.
I was uncomfortable, because I had not taken the time to put God first. I had fallen into a routine of expecting my husband to fulfill every need, feeling, want, desire that i felt. I had put a task on him that no human being could ever accomplish, or should accomplish. So when he falls short of unspoken, unrealistic, superhuman powers, I resent him. Why isn't he meeting my needs?
It's simple- because they aren't needs that he can meet.
Yes, my husband is amazing & I am so grateful for the role that he plays in my life. That role as a companion. He is my life partner, but not my soul provider.
Once this clicked in my head, got my focus off of myself & my husband not meeting my needs- and put that focus into loving Jesus, it all fell into place. I am thankful for God's grace, his guidance, and his whispers that allow us to realize we are wrong. I am also thankful for a husband who I can openly apologize too, when I realize I have been wrong.
Love is sweet, but not because it's easy. Love makes you a better person & I am definitely better because of it.
I feel like any married person can completely agree and relate! ah, the many ways that marriage sharpens you... you're wise beyond your years, dear!
ReplyDeleteThank you Misty!! So thankful for so many great ladies I get to share this marriage journey with, making it even better!
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